Our normal self is full of existential holes.
In the intricate tapestry of human existence, there lies a profound concept that often goes unnoticed: the ‘holes’ that shape our perceptions, beliefs, and actions. The ‘Theory of Holes’ is a groundbreaking exploration into the voids within our psyche, formed by lost connections to our true essence. As you embark on this enlightening journey, you’ll uncover the deep-seated biases and prejudices that stem from these voids and discover the path to reconnecting with your authentic self.
We live in a world where basic human activity is attempting to fill or avoid a sense of emptiness, deficiency, or meaninglessness.
The Theory of Holes is a unique understanding of the relationship between the psychological and the spiritual. Developed by A. H. Almaas, the theory of holes describes how development in childhood disconnects us from our true nature which results in a sense of missing “parts” of ourselves. Experientially, the missing part creates a sense of deficient space in us psychologically and physically, a sense of existential emptiness which is quite challenging to experience.
As children, our attention is constantly directed outward toward the world. Given that we lack the capacities for self-reflection and abstract thought in our early development, the sense of these holes and what is missing slips into the unconscious.
But that’s not all…
This doesn’t mean that unconscious holes don’t influence us. In fact, these holes are one of the major dynamics driving human behavior.
These holes not only shape our experience and identity, they, in fact, underlie our sense of who we are and shape our beliefs and opinions.
Here’s what A. H. Almaas says about holes:
A hole refers to any part of you that has been lost, meaning any part of you that you have lost consciousness of. Ultimately what we have lost awareness of is our essence. When we are not aware of our essence, it stops manifesting. Then we feel a sense of deficiency. So a hole is nothing but the absence of a certain part of our essence. It could be the loss of love, loss of value, loss of capacity for contact, loss of strength, any of the qualities of Essence. There are many of them. However to say we have lost parts of Essence does not mean they are gone forever; they are never gone forever. You are simply cut off from them. Let’s take, for example, the quality of value or self-esteem. When you are cut off from your value, the actual experience is a sense that there is a hole inside that feels empty. You feel a sense of deficiency, a sense of inferiority, and you want to fill this hole with value from the outside. You may try to use approval, praise, whatever. You try to fill the hole with fake value. We walk around with lots of holes, but we usually aren’t aware of them. We’re usually aware of desires: “I want praise. I want to be successful. I want this person to love me. I want this or that experience.” The presence of desires and needs indicates the presence of holes. – Diamond Heart Book One: Elements of the Real in Man
I can’t emphasize enough
The influence of our holes undermines all of our attempts to be true to ourselves – a consequence of promoting our ego-self due to our identification with it.
The daily toll that holes inflict on us is a never-ending series of “micro-traumas” around deficiency, meaninglessness, and self-esteem.
To understand the theory of holes one must have a concept of essence.
Essence is not an object we find within ourselves; it is the true nature of who we are when we are relaxed and authentic, when we are not pretending to be one way or another, consciously or unconsciously. Essence is the truth of our very presence, the purity of our consciousness and awareness. It is what we are in our original and undefiled beingness, the ultimate core reality of our soul. Essence is the authentic presence of our Being; it is, in fact, Being in its thatness. Different spiritual traditions have given it different names: Christianity, Judaism, and Islam called it Spirit; Buddhism calls it Buddha nature; Taoism calls it the Tao; Hinduism calls it Atman or Brahman. The various traditions differ in how they conceptualize Essence and how much they emphasize it in their teaching, but essence is always considered to be the most authentic, innate, and fundamental nature of who we are. And the experience and realization of Essence is the central task of spiritual work and development in all traditions. – Spacecruiser Inquiry – A H. Almaas
The central methodology of spiritual work in the Diamond Approach is open and open-ended inquiry. A lot of the initial work involves working with the theory of holes.
We explore the psychological to open up the spiritual
What’s the real story underlying ego and personality?
The theory of holes has a precise understanding of the relationships between a particular hole and the essential quality that was lost, the main barriers and issues associated with the hole, and the false aspect that gets created by the personality in its futile attempts to recreate what was lost.
A hole gets filled by a sector of the personality that is related to the lost aspect of essence. We also saw that this sector of the personality is related to its particular aspect of essence by the unconscious memories of the experiences and situations that led to the loss and of the emotions involved in those experiences. In fact, this sector of the personality has in it the memory of the essential aspect itself, and so it is intimately connected to this aspect of essence. Its beginning and development contain the memory of the lost aspect, but the memory is mostly repressed. To remember it consciously involves confronting the painful situations that instituted the repression. – Essence with the Elixir of Enlightenment – A. H. Almaas
Why does this matter?
Normal human life is a constant and never-ending pursuit for satisfaction, peace, and contentment that is founded on the conviction that what is needed is obtained from the external world. But, what’s really needed is to reconnect with what was lost, what’s real in us. This is the only thing that will bring true, lasting fulfillment and pleasure. More than anything, this is a case of mistaken identity or amnesia – we believe we are the external self, but the faint memories of the real keep calling.
Courage and a desire to know (curiosity) are two factors that will support the process of resolving the holes.
How can you actually use this?
This entire exploration is really nothing more than remembering where we come from.
A personal story that may help: The Futility of Trying to Fill Holes