Forgiveness and For(get)give

If only forgiveness and forgetting were that easy.

Why isn’t it?

Two factors come immediately to mind:

1. When we mentally tell ourselves to forgive or forget, we reinforce the memory of the offense.
2. The mind telling the heart what to do with feelings is an exercise in futility, frustration, and disappointment.

Forgiveness involves both mind and heart – it isn’t a doing.

One of the great understandings of the Diamond Approach is how the ego mind tries to create the real in attempts to heal and survive. The issue is that the real is already created, so the ego mind can’t create it. It’s best attempts are always deficient of the secret ingredient – realness.

The Diamond Approach’s unique and precise understanding of the connection between the loss of essence and psychodynamic issues gives us insight into how true nature functions as forgiveness.

You can easily remember a situation in your life where you keep returning to “forgive and forget.”

The key to forgiveness isn’t a mental action or a forgetting of the past. Forgiveness involves an essential quality of the soul that affects both heart and mind.

The green of compassion is co-emergent with the spaciousness of sky-blue mind, which arises as the turquoise aspect of forgiveness. Compassion is needed to relax and relieve the burden of the heart’s hurt and wounding. The blue aspect is consciousness. Sky-blue is the vast, spaciousness of clear space and consciousness – this clears the mind of the past, returning it to innocence.

The Blue aspect arises in the center of the head, just as the Green aspect arises in the center of the chest. From this we can also see that just as the Green is the sensitivity that forms the essence of the heart, the Blue is the consciousness that forms the essence of the mind. This is probably the reason why some Sufis consider the Blue to be connected to the Green, as if they form the two sides of one latifa. – A, H. Almaas, Spacecruiser Inquiry: True Guidance for the Inner Journey, ch. 22

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Forgiving and Forgetting

Forgiveness is not merely a mental action or an attempt to forget the past; it is a profound journey involving the mind and the heart, transcending the superficial layers of our being to touch the soul. The Diamond Approach emphasizes that the ego mind often endeavors to create realness as a survival mechanism, but realness is already inherently present, making the ego’s attempts inherently deficient. True forgiveness is not about enforcing forgetfulness or mentally willing ourselves to forgive; it is about embracing an essential quality of the soul that impacts our emotions and thoughts, allowing compassion and consciousness to co-emerge and guide us toward healing and understanding.

The concept of forgetting is not about erasing our history or experiences but clearing the mind of the burdens of the past, returning it to a state of innocence and openness. It is about allowing the spaciousness of consciousness to relieve the heart’s hurt and wounding, enabling us to view reality with a fresh perspective and a renewed sense of self. In this light, forgetting is not a loss but a return to our true nature, a reconnection with the essence of our mind and heart, allowing us to live more authentically and fully in the present moment.