The Roots of Comfort are in Strength
Comfort, in its modern sense, often conveys a state of repose—a soothing balm that eases the soul’s afflictions and the body’s pains. Yet, if we consider its etymological roots, we find that true comfort is not merely the absence of discomfort but the presence of a supportive strength that fortifies us during times of distress. This suggests that true comfort is more than superficial relief; it is fundamentally restorative and empowering.
Today’s Definition of “comfort”:
- A state of physical ease and freedom from pain or constraint.
- The easing or alleviation of a person’s feelings of grief or distress.
- A person or thing that provides consolation or a feeling of relief.
The etymology of “comfort” illuminates a profound, often overlooked dimension of its meaning—rooted in the entwined concepts of strength and togetherness. This linguistic journey from “confortare” (to strengthen greatly) to the contemporary nuances of ease and alleviation beckons a deeper exploration into the spiritual interplay between these elements.
Etymology of “comfort”:
The word “comfort” comes from the Late Latin word “confortare,” which means “to strengthen greatly.” This Latin term is derived from the prefix “com-,” meaning “together,” and “fortis,” meaning “strong.”
In Old French, the word became “conforter,” which meant “to help, strengthen, encourage.” This Old French term was adopted into Middle English as “conforten” in the 13th century.
Over time, the term’s meaning shifted from providing strength or support to a person enduring difficulties to the more general sense of physical and emotional well-being that we associate with the word today.
So, while the modern meaning of “comfort” relates to ease, relief, and freedom from pain, its etymological roots emphasize providing strength and support, particularly in times of hardship.
In the framework of the Diamond Approach, strength transcends mere physical might, embodying an expansive force that underpins autonomy and catalyzes action. This form of strength fuels courage, empowers boldness, and fosters a readiness to face life’s challenges. It is a dynamic quality that supports steadfastness—like the deep roots of a tree—and encourages vulnerability and openness, integrating traits that might traditionally appear contradictory.
The original connotation of ‘comfort’ derived from Old French—“conforter,” meaning “to help, strengthen, encourage”—highlights its essence as an empowering and encouraging force. This aligns with the red essence’s qualities of strength and vigor rather than merely suggesting a grounding presence. In the Diamond Approach, this strength is not about seeking stability and peace externally but rather about an internal fortification that arises from being aligned with one’s true nature. Thus, comfort emerges intrinsically as a bold expression of one’s authentic self, providing clarity and a profound sense of inner peace.
This intrinsic strength offers a comfort that is not an escape from reality but a courageous confrontation with it. It does not shield us from the truth of our experiences but rather equips us to face them with integrity and presence. Herein lies the spiritual interconnection: true comfort, or inner peace, arises not from avoiding challenges but engaging with them through the strength of our innermost being.
Thus, the evolution of the word “comfort” from a context of empowering support to one of easing suffering reflects a broader spiritual journey. It mirrors the path from external reliance toward finding solace and strength within oneself. This is the spiritual call to action: seeking comfort is not merely alleviating dissatisfaction and suffering but in the robustness of spirit that enables us to endure, evolve, and emerge whole.
In exploring the multifaceted nature of “comfort,” it is essential to recognize its existence as a single dimension of ease and relief and as a layered, tri-dimensional concept encompassing external, psychological, and spiritual realms.
Dimension One: External Comfort
Our first point of interaction with comfort is through our external environment, which includes the physical spaces we inhabit, our appearance, and our social interactions. Comfort in this dimension is cultivated through adjustments in our surroundings and personal presentation. Comfortable clothing and grooming enhance self-esteem and ease while living and working in aesthetically pleasing environments boost our mental well-being. Architectural choices, furniture ergonomics, and even our technological devices’ functionality significantly enhance our external comfort. This dimension emphasizes that our sense of well-being is often influenced by how harmoniously our environments resonate with our values and needs.
Our ignorance manifests in this dimension by trying to manipulate externals to find comfort instead of comfort expressing itself in and through externals—comfort expresses itself in its surroundings.
I dress myself, not to impress, but for comfort and for style. – Lindsey Wixson
Dimension Two: Internal Psychological Comfort
This dimension shifts focus from the external to the internal and delves into the psychological underpinnings of our sense of comfort. It involves understanding the emotional cycle of charge and discharge, which mirrors our energy levels’ natural ebb and flow. When attuned to this internal rhythm, we skillfully navigate the peaks and valleys of our emotional landscape.
True psychological comfort requires a deep understanding of our emotional world. As we become more adept at recognizing and accepting emotions without judgment, we create space for them to flow through us naturally rather than becoming trapped or overwhelming.
This flow of emotional experience is the hallmark of genuine psychological comfort. When we allow emotions to arise and pass without resistance, we tap into a deep well of inner peace and stability. We no longer need to control or suppress our emotional states; instead, we develop a profound trust in our ability to ride the waves of our internal experience with grace and ease.
As we cultivate this emotional fluency, we discover that comfort is not about maintaining a static state of happiness or tranquility. Instead, it is about developing the capacity to move with the natural rhythms of our emotional life, embracing the full spectrum of our feelings without losing our sense of groundedness.
In this way, psychological comfort expresses our emotional wholeness and authenticity. It allows us to be fully present with our inner world, to honor our needs and desires, and to respond to life’s challenges with flexibility and resilience. By nurturing this dimension of comfort, we create a foundation of inner well-being that permeates every aspect of our lives, allowing us to experience a deep sense of contentment and ease, regardless of our external circumstances.
The ache for home lives in all of us. The safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned. – Maya Angelou
Dimension Three: Spiritual Discomfort
The third dimension delves into the paradox of spiritual discomfort, which is integral to our deepest growth. This realm challenges our core beliefs and perceptions, pushing us towards embracing uncertainty and profound existential questions. True comfort in this dimension is not found through external ease or psychological stability but through a deep reconciliation with our true self. Spiritual practices such as meditation and open-ended inquiry are essential tools that help us confront and peel back layers of superficial identity, expanding our capacity for a deeper, more profound comfort.
The best things in life are often waiting for you at the exit ramp of your comfort zone. – Karen Salmansohn
Integrating the Dynamism of Comfort
Integrating these dimensions reveals that true comfort is a dynamic state of being, an aliveness of reality. This concept of aliveness does not imply a mere absence of pain but a vibrant engagement with life, characterized by an openness to experience and a capacity to respond authentically to existential challenges. Aliveness breathes life into each dimension of comfort, ensuring that our journey through external adjustments, psychological resilience, and spiritual exploration is not static but a vibrant and evolving quest.
The etymology of “comfort,” rooted in strength and support, complements this idea of aliveness. It suggests that comfort, in its deepest sense, is about fortifying the soul, enabling it to thrive in harmony with its surroundings, balance its inner dialogues, and embrace the spiritual odysseys that life presents. This holistic approach does not simplify the pursuit of comfort but enriches it, making it a robust engagement with life that acknowledges its shadows and lights.
We are called to a life of greater contentment, stability, and spiritual peace as we embrace this enriched perspective on comfort. The path to achieving this state is inherently challenging and fraught with necessary and transformative discomforts. Yet, precisely through these challenges, we achieve a profound internal and external harmony—the ultimate reward of our journeys.
The Contentment (Satisfaction) of Comfort
From the perspective of the ego-self, the relationship between comfort and contentment often manifests as a pursuit for external fulfillment—those aspects of life that promise ease and relief from discomfort. Yet, from a spiritual vantage point, these are not qualities to be sought but inherent aspects of our being that surface into consciousness when ego-activity ceases.
Contentment often conflated with happiness, speaks to a deep-seated satisfaction that is not contingent on external conditions but is a state of grace that emerges when one is in harmony with oneself and the universe. Comfort, on the other hand, is commonly associated with physical and emotional ease. It is generally pursued as a means to shield oneself from the rigors and distresses of life. However, comfort and contentment transcend conventional definitions when viewed through a spiritual lens.
Etymology of “contentment”:
The word “contentment” is derived from the adjective “content,” which comes from the Middle English word “content,” meaning “satisfied.” This word originated from the Old French term “content,” derived from the Latin word “contentus.”
“Contentus” is the past participle of the Latin verb “continere,” which means “to contain, to hold within limits.” This Latin verb is composed of the prefix “con-,” meaning “with” or “together,” and the verb “tenere,” meaning “to hold.”
The Latin “contentus” literally means “contained,” but it also carries the figurative sense of being satisfied with what one has or with what is within one’s bounds.
The suffix “-ment,” which comes from the Latin “-mentum,” forms nouns from verbs, often denoting the result or product of the verb’s action. In this case, it transforms the adjective “content” into the noun “contentment,” referring to the state of being content or satisfied.
So, the etymology of “contentment” suggests being satisfied or happy with what one has or what is within one’s limits, emphasizing the idea of finding fulfillment within one’s current circumstances.
In the Diamond Approach, comfort is seen not merely as a remedy for physical or emotional ailments but as a fundamental attribute of our true nature that is robust yet serene, powerful yet peaceful. This inherent strength provides the stabilizing force that allows for the emergence of contentment—a serene acceptance of ‘what is,’ coupled with an unshakeable peace that pervades one’s being, regardless of external circumstances.
This profound union of comfort and contentment illustrates that when we cease the relentless striving of the ego-self, what remains is a natural state of wholeness. Contentment is not something to be achieved but recognized as ever-present within the calm and the storm of life’s varied experiences. It does not mean a passive resignation to circumstances but a vibrant engagement with life fueled by an inner comfort that does not waver.
The ego’s pursuit of comfort and contentment often leads to a paradox: the more one seeks them, the more elusive they become. True contentment arises not from having everything we want but from recognizing that what we have is sufficient—that our essence is complete as it is. This realization does not negate the desire for external comforts but puts them in perspective. They are enjoyed and appreciated but do not define one’s state of contentment.
Thus, the spiritual journey toward understanding and integrating comfort and contentment is a delicate, artful dance that helps us peel away the layers of ego-driven desires and fears, allowing the true self to manifest with its intrinsic tranquility and strength. As we align more closely with our inner essence, comfort and contentment cease to be goals and become our natural state, offering us a way to live with profound peace and satisfaction, irrespective of the outer conditions of our lives.
Ridhwan
The Ridhwan School, with its foundational teachings rooted in the Diamond Approach, provides a unique perspective on spiritual development that deeply resonates with the concepts of comfort and contentment. Ridhwan, meaning “contentment” in Arabic, underscores a central theme of the approach: the realization and embodiment of our true nature, which intrinsically is a state of contentment and comfort.
In Arabic, ridhwan is an “active noun.” It is the agent of contentment and the state of contentment co-emergent. In Islam, Ridhwan is the angel at the gate of paradise.
Ridhwan and the Essence of Comfort
At the heart of the Ridhwan School’s philosophy is the understanding that true comfort is not merely the absence of discomfort but is an expression of being aligned with one’s deepest essence. This essence is characterized by clarity, strength, love, and peace. From a Ridhwan perspective, comfort emerges not from external circumstances but from the profound alignment with these essential qualities. It is a comfort that sustains not because conditions are favorable, but because there is a deep resonance with the truth of one’s being.
Contentment in Ridhwan: The Realization of Wholeness
Contentment, or Ridhwan, in the context of the Diamond Approach, is a fundamental acceptance and satisfaction with what is. It expresses the realization that one’s true nature is already whole and complete. This contentment transcends ordinary definitions that tie to specific outcomes or material possessions. Instead, it is a contentment that flourishes from within, irrespective of external changes or challenges.
In the spiritual journey guided by the Diamond Approach, practitioners explore various aspects of their personal experience—emotions, intellect, sensations—and through this exploration, they recognize the overlays of personality that obscure their innate wholeness. As these overlays are understood and integrated, the underlying contentment synonymous with their true nature begins to manifest more fully in their everyday lives.
Comfort and Contentment as Spiritual Unfoldment
The interplay between comfort and contentment in Ridhwan is a dynamic process of spiritual unfoldment. Comfort is initially sought to ease the pain of separation from our true nature; it is a natural desire that drives the spiritual seeker toward inquiry. However, as one progresses, the nature of comfort evolves. It becomes less about alleviating pain and more about embodying the strength and serenity of one’s essential qualities.
Similarly, contentment shifts from an elusive goal dependent on external conditions to a stable presence that accompanies the recognition of one’s essence. This shift is profound—not that the external world ceases to present challenges, but instead that one’s responses to these challenges are rooted in a deep-seated sense of completeness.
Integrating Comfort and Contentment
In practical terms, integrating comfort and contentment involves a process of self-inquiry and presence characteristic of the Ridhwan School. Practitioners are encouraged to explore their experiences deeply, question the origins of their discomforts and dissatisfactions, and understand how the ego-self constructs their perceptions of lack or need.
As these constructions are illuminated and understood, the space opens for the qualities of essence to permeate one’s being. Comfort then arises naturally as these qualities stabilize and become integrated into the fabric of daily life. Contentment emerges as the clear recognition of one’s wholeness amidst the fluctuating circumstances of life.
In Ridhwan, the journey towards comfort and contentment is essentially a return to one’s true nature, a process of uncovering the inherent peace and completeness that lie at the core of every individual. This journey challenges conventional pursuits of comfort and contentment, directing seekers toward a more profound and spiritually mature understanding of these states. Thus, in the path of the Ridhwan School, comfort and contentment are not states to be achieved but vibrant qualities of our true essence that illuminate the way to a deeper, more fulfilled existence.