Superego dancing with the enneagram
A dear friend (Maggie) called to say her husband (Roland) wants a divorce. They’ve been married for about 15 years. They seem perfectly suited for each other and had many years of good times and sweet loving until issues arose several years ago. I’ve had a few in-depth conversations and inquiries with Maggie in the last couple of years. As I see it, a central dynamic seems to be superegos dancing.
A little enneagram insight might be useful. Maggie is enneagram type one, and Roland is enneagram type seven.
Perfection, standards, and ideals are significant elements in type one’s psyche. They have a well-defined sense of standards and razor-sharp critical perception. Their attention is immediately drawn to things that need a little or a lot of correction.
Type seven avoids pain. Consequently, they may not be avid fans of introspection into emotional conflict even though their mind is great at intellectual inquiry.
Maggie has a strong and active superego, but Roland has one of the most caustic, unrelenting superegos I’ve ever witnessed. It’s unbelievably brutal in self-abuse when triggered and, of course, is running 24/7 in the background.
Enneagram points one and seven are connected. Seven to one is seen as a movement to greater defensiveness, while one to seven is seen as a movement to less defensiveness.
This post is not an in-depth treatise on the superego, nor the superego. I assume that most people reading this know more than a little about these topics. If not, follow the links for more info.
I was discussing this situation with my BFF (best friend forever). She’s a 30+-year student of the Diamond Approach as am I. She said this to me – I feel blessed by this work which helps us to work through our conditioning, helping us to live with more freedom.
The work on the superego is an extensive body of work and practice for students in the Diamond Approach. I remember my first teacher saying to our group that ten years is a good start in working with the superego.
Many Diamond Approach students study the enneagram of personality types to:
- help with understanding patterns of behavior and attention
- get more insight into character structure and traits
- understand interpersonal and intra-personal dynamics
The Diamond Approach has specific teachings on the Enneagram of Passions & Virtues as well as the Facets of Unity: The Enneagram of Holy Ideas .
It’s sad and torturous for all of us when we continue to live within the walls of our past and be terrorized and victimized by the superego.
From Love to Tyranny is one way to see the development of the superego.
From Tyranny to Love is one way to see the soul’s journey to freedom.
Links of Interest:
- Issues
- Books
- The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram: Nine Faces of the Soul
- Here is one of the first books to explore authentically and comprehensively the original spiritual dimension of the enneagram. Among the most knowledgeable teachers of the enneagram in America, Sandra Maitri shows how the enneagram not only reveals our personalities but illuminates a basic essence within each of us. She shows how traversing the inner territory particular to our ennea-type can bring us profound fulfillment, meaning, and authentic spiritual development.
- The Enneagram of Passions and Virtues: Finding the Way Home
- The Enneagram of Passions and Virtues illuminates human experience beyond personality functions. Using the spiritual psychology of the enneagram, Sandra Maitri highlights two core aspects of human consciousness: the passions and the virtues. The passions are the ego-driven emotional states that dominate our lives, such as anger, pride, and fear. Discovering and understanding the passions experientially can lead us to what lies beyond the personality. As we do, the virtues-which include serenity, humility, and courage-naturally arise to support our unfoldment. This giving way from the passions to the virtues is one of the hallmarks of inner development.
- Facets of Unity: The Enneagram of Holy Ideas
- Facets of Unity presents the Enneagram of Holy Ideas as a crystal clear window on the true reality experienced in enlightened consciousness. Here we are not directed toward the psychological types but the higher spiritual realities they reflect. We discover how the disconnection from each Holy Idea leads to the development of its corresponding fixation, thus recognizing each type’s deeper psychological core. Understanding this core brings each Holy Idea within reach, so its spiritual perspective can be a key for unlocking the fixation and freeing us from its limitations.
- Keys to the Enneagram: How to Unlock the Highest Potential of Every Personality Type
- Almaas’s focus is not on typology, nor character structure, but on how to understand and work with your fixation to open the doorways offered by the enneagram into the deeper dimensions of your true nature. Keys to the Enneagram is, in a sense, part of an owner’s manual with precise information on how to get “under the hood” of your specific model.
- The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram: Nine Faces of the Soul
FAQ
Q: What is the superego, and how does it relate to the enneagram and Diamond Approach?
A: The superego is a psychological concept that represents our internalized moral and social standards. The superego influences our personality and behavior and how it intersects with the enneagram and Diamond Approach in understanding our patterns and motivations.
Q: What is the enneagram, and how does it relate to the Diamond Approach?
A: The enneagram is a personality system that maps out nine distinct personality types. The enneagram can provide valuable insights into our thinking, feeling, and behavior patterns. It further explores how the Diamond Approach, a spiritual teaching, can complement the enneagram by providing a framework for self-discovery and personal transformation.
Q: How can the Diamond Approach enhance self-awareness and personal growth?
A: The Diamond Approach offers a unique approach to self-awareness and personal growth by combining psychological inquiry with spiritual exploration. The Diamond Approach encourages individuals to deeply examine their beliefs, emotions, and experiences to uncover their true nature and potential for growth.
Q: How does the article discuss the relationship between the superego, enneagram, and the Diamond Approach?
A: The superego, enneagram, and the Diamond Approach intersect and support each other in understanding and addressing our inner patterns and limitations. The enneagram can help identify our default personality tendencies, while the Diamond Approach offers practices and teachings that can facilitate the transformation of these patterns.
Q: Pactical tips or exercises for applying these concepts in everyday life?
A: Incorporating self-reflection, mindfulness, and compassionate self-observation can support the integration of the superego, enneagram, and Diamond Approach into one’s daily life.
Diamond Approach Enneagram On-demand Courses
In this 11-module course, Sandra Maitri and Russ Hudson will synthesize decades of Enneagram knowledge and teaching experience with a lifetime of Diamond Approach spiritual development and methodology to help us reconnect to our essential being through the Enneagram. Click Here for Access
In this course, we will explore how the particular ‘take’ on reality at the core of each of the nine types begins and the resulting belief structures, emotional patterns, and behaviors. Click Here for Access